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2004-03-30 -Short Attention Span Theater-
Jacksonville man burned when he fires rocket at girlfriend
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Posted by TS 2004-03-30 2:27:37 PM|| E-Mail|| Front Page|| [11130 views since 2007-05-07]  Top

#1 The guy's name is Shannon? Mercy me.
Posted by Bomb-a-rama 2004-03-30 2:52:15 PM||   2004-03-30 2:52:15 PM|| Front Page Top

#2 a bottle rocket the diameter of a golfball? Sounds like the redneck vasectomy joke
Posted by Frank G  2004-03-30 2:59:35 PM||   2004-03-30 2:59:35 PM|| Front Page Top

#3 Seconds later, after the rocket blasted around inside the car...

I'd have paid to see that. A human version of Wile E. Coyote.
Posted by tu3031 2004-03-30 3:04:37 PM||   2004-03-30 3:04:37 PM|| Front Page Top

#4 Will Fred please put this in the Classics?
Posted by Korora  2004-03-30 3:11:57 PM|| [http://basementburrow.blogspot.com]  2004-03-30 3:11:57 PM|| Front Page Top

#5 Look at the bright side, he avoided a Darwin award -- barely.
I dont know about that. He only had to make himself unable to contribute to the genepool to get a Darwin -- his death is not exactly required (but is usually the method of being unable...).

Course now they will be calling him 'ole stumpy'....
Posted by CrazyFool  2004-03-30 3:15:36 PM||   2004-03-30 3:15:36 PM|| Front Page Top

#6 Ahhh... Jacksonville. Panama City without the beach. You have to keep in mind that Jacksonville is only 55 miles from Fargo Ga., 45 Miles from Raiford, 60 miles from Kings Bay. It's a strange mix and used to be stranger.

If there was a RedNeck Secret Command Post it could very well be in the basement of the Seaboard Bldg.

Posted by Shipman 2004-03-30 3:30:42 PM||   2004-03-30 3:30:42 PM|| Front Page Top

#7 redneck vasectomy joke

OK, Frank, let's have it. (I don't get around much so I realize I'm prolly the only one hasn't heard it)
Posted by Dave D.  2004-03-30 3:38:34 PM||   2004-03-30 3:38:34 PM|| Front Page Top

#8 Redneck wants a budget vasectomy, Doc gives him a big ol' firecracker, tells him to light it and count to 10, knowing he'd have to put it between his legs while he uses both hands to count to 10.....
Posted by Frank G  2004-03-30 3:46:02 PM||   2004-03-30 3:46:02 PM|| Front Page Top

#9 I wonder how long until he decides to sue the manufacturer for a defective product?
Posted by Chemist 2004-03-30 4:04:13 PM||   2004-03-30 4:04:13 PM|| Front Page Top

#10 ship - youve been to the Seaboard building!!!!!!!

Posted by Liberalhawk 2004-03-30 4:46:03 PM||   2004-03-30 4:46:03 PM|| Front Page Top

#11 Heh. Guess I should've been able to figure that one out by myself.
Posted by Dave D.  2004-03-30 5:38:27 PM||   2004-03-30 5:38:27 PM|| Front Page Top

#12 Yes LH. Until the antichrist made AmTrack I had a pass on SCL. :)

I was just gettin going with it too... LOL.
I can't talk about the basement tho. It's indigo.
Seriously I guess it's been 20 years since I was in the building.

Posted by Shipman 2004-03-30 5:41:03 PM||   2004-03-30 5:41:03 PM|| Front Page Top

#13 When I was a kid, it became very hard to buy Estes rocket motors because vandals were throwing them into phone booths with fuses lit. I always wondered what would happen to person stupid enough to ignite the fuse while he himself – I have decided to exclude females from this psychosis based on personal experience, as I never met a pubescent girl pyro - was inside the booth. I wonder no longer. I have patiently waited nearly 30 years for a zipperhead to answer this question for me. I even suffered through Jackass the Movie in hopes of gaining this knowledge. A wise man once said that good things come to those who wait. I would like to add that 3rd degree burns to the scrotum come to those who have twisted ideas and no patience.
Posted by Super Hose  2004-03-30 9:44:33 PM||   2004-03-30 9:44:33 PM|| Front Page Top

#14 Any pictures of this guy? I'm thinking mullett here, right?
Posted by tu3031 2004-03-30 11:43:57 PM||   2004-03-30 11:43:57 PM|| Front Page Top

#15 ship - i worked there in a previous life, 17 years ago.
Posted by liberalhawk 2004-03-31 12:34:10 AM||   2004-03-31 12:34:10 AM|| Front Page Top

#16 Mullet! Texas Tailgate Mullet! Trailer-park mullet! Mulletman!
Posted by Antimullet 2004-04-03 9:25:07 PM||   2004-04-03 9:25:07 PM|| Front Page Top

#17 let me see, if his mustang was pre-1990, then yeah - I'd say mullet action. If he was in a camaro then he's definitely sporting a kentucky waterfall.....
Posted by Jarhead 2004-04-03 9:37:39 PM||   2004-04-03 9:37:39 PM|| Front Page Top

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