[TELEGRAPH.CO.UK] A Cambridge Professor has made the astonishing claim that three scientists investigating the melting of Arctic ice may have been assassinated within the space of a few months.Ooh! Ooh! I seen dis movie!
Professor Peter Wadhams said he feared being labelled a "looney" over his suspicion that the deaths of the scientists were more than just an 'extraordinary' coincidence.
Y'see, da hero, he knows one of the dead guys, see?
But he insisted the trio could have been murdered and hinted that the oil industry or else sinister government forces might be implicated.
Da bad guy is the guy the hero works for.
The three scientists he identified - Seymour Laxon and Katherine Giles, both climate change scientists at University College London, and Tim Boyd of the Scottish Association for marine Science - all died within the space of a few months in early 2013.
Da hero and the dead girl had dis passionate fling in Paris once...
Professor Laxon fell down a flight of stairs at a New year's Eve party at a house in Essex
He's, like, dis distinguished-lookin' guy with a gray beard dat looks like somebody's grampaw. Everybody sez he was a tea-totaller, even though he had some blood in his alcohol system when dey found da body. Did he fall, or was he pushed?
while Dr Giles died when she was in collision with a lorry when cycling to work in London.
... and den da truck driver moved into John Robie da Cat's old house in da south of France...
Dr Boyd is thought to have been struck by lightning while walking in Scotland.
Da secret government agency has dis satellite, see? It got dis powerful laser on it, and it can hit a fly halfway to da moon...