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-Short Attention Span Theater-
Playboy Founder Hefner Marries for Third Time at 86
2013-01-02
Only three? I'm shocked.
[An Nahar] Playboy magazine founder Hugh Hefner has tied the knot for the third time, marrying a former Playmate 60 years his junior in an intimate New Year's Eve ceremony at the Playboy Mansion. Hefner, 86, and Crystal Harris, 26, announced the nuptials on their Twitter feeds -- @hughhefner and @crystalhefner -- and posted pictures of the wedding.
Imagine how disappointed he'll be if he ever discovers that sex isn't the only thing in life.
"Happy New Year from Mr. and Mrs. Hugh Hefner!" Hefner said in a message accompanied by a picture of the octogenarian sporting purple pajamas and a captain's hat and the blonde Harris in her wedding dress.

Harris posted a picture on her own Twitter feed of the ceremony conducted under an archway of red, pink, purple and white flowers.

"Today is the day I become Mrs. Hugh Hefner. Feeling very happy, lucky, and blessed," she tweeted shortly before the wedding.
Cha-ching...
Hefner and Harris had planned to marry in 2011 but she called off the ceremony at the last minute.
"I'm much too young," had quothen the maiden. "Wait a year, then I'll be all grown up."
Posted by:Fred

#8  The way I saw this described last year when it was announced was "cooking a steak over a pilot light."

By now the pilot light is probably a little dimmer.
Posted by: tfsm sorta on the road   2013-01-02 19:30  

#7  "Only three? I'm shocked."

I'm shocked he married at all, tw.

Why buy the cow when you can get a whole herd's worth of milk for free?
Posted by: Barbara   2013-01-02 18:51  

#6  "Can't you see that this is the last act of a desperate man?"
"We don't care if it's the first act of Henry the Fifth, we're leaving!"
-- Blazing Saddles
Posted by: Muggsy Mussolini1226   2013-01-02 17:02  

#5  I am puzzled by his motives. He was already taking blue pills for the occasional pathetic poke at a dozen girls (politely hiding their disgust) in one night. So it wasn't about sex. But I doubt he married a bimbo named Crystal for her wit, compassion, steadfastness, intellect, tolerance, wisdom, and character. He's 86. Just afraid of being alone when he croaks?
Posted by: RandomJD   2013-01-02 16:54  

#4  Eeeewwwww! Gonna be takin' a lotta them little blue pills!
Posted by: Ebbang Uluque6305   2013-01-02 12:47  

#3  in potentia non sit amor
Posted by: Jack Snusotch2775   2013-01-02 09:27  

#2  I think this is the one. The Last One.
Posted by: Bobby   2013-01-02 06:02  

#1  Feeling very happy, lucky, and blessed

A sentiment also frequently voiced among Powerball winners.
Posted by: Besoeker   2013-01-02 01:54  

00:00