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-Short Attention Span Theater-
Top Priorities of Acting President CheneyÂ’s First 100 Minutes
2007-07-20
While Bush undergoes a routine colonoscopy Saturday, he will transfer presidential powers to Dick Cheney. Here's a list of President Cheney's promises to the American people for his first 100 minutes.


Minute 1: Nuke Baghdad (I think they meant Tehran)

Minute 15: Eliminate the Department of Homeland Security and replace it with Jack Bauer

Minute 36: Tea with Karl Rove

Minute 51: Nuke North Korea

Minute 65: By executive order, allot Wyoming 3 more senatorsÂ… and a baseball team

Minute 73: Send Joe and Valerie Wilson to Guantanamo

Minute 81: Change into Darth Vadar costume and conspire with the Prince of Darkness

Minute 90: Actually pardon Scooter Libby, because the last president wasnÂ’t cowboy enough to do it right the first time

Minute 93: “Respectfully but resolutely” assert importance of Halliburton

Minute 100: Hold press conference confirming the beliefs of Arianna Huffington and Kossacks nationwide that he is, in fact, evil
Posted by:Sherry

#1  comments); ?>werwer
Posted by: FOTSGreg   2007-07-20 18:12  

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