U.S. forces launched a "precision strike" on Thursday on a building in Falluja said to be used by A highly reliable "source" when it comes to casualties in normally serene Fallujah. Did you know Fallujah is the home of the Iraqi Rotary Infidel Shredder Club?
"Several intelligence sources reported that Zarqawi terrorists were using the safehouse at the time of the strike to plan attacks against Iraqi citizens and Multinational Forces," the U.S. military said in a statement. "Significant secondary explosions were observed during the impact indicating a large cache of illegal ordnance was stored in the safe house."
Nope. It was 'sploding baby ducks. They do that in Fallujah.
Doctors at Falluja's main hospital said at least three people were killed and eight wounded.
And they were all, uh, innocent bystanders. Everyone in Fallujah stands by - all the time - to remove any evidence of not standing by.
The U.S. military says it takes care to avoid civilian casualties, and has accused Falluja doctors of exaggerating casualty reports. But Falluja residents insist civilians are regularly killed and wounded in air strikes.
"Sure thing! After we take the dead guy's RPG and grenades, we take pix with our digital cell-phones and send 'em off to Al Jizz. Voila! Proof! Thank you for these nifty devices! We'd be simple camel herders without such generous and plentiful anywhere-but-Islam technology! Why, we can't even make Damascus steel anymore - comes from Taiwan or Japan!"
Zarqawi's group has claimed responsibility for many of the deadliest suicide car bomb attacks in Iraq since Saddam Hussein was overthrown, and has killed several foreign hostages.
He's in very delicate negotiations right now with several famous cutlery firms for his endorsement, in fact.
The group has threatened to behead British hostage Ken Bigley unless female prisoners are released from jails in Iraq.
Panties optional.