Is it weird enough for you yet? Alex was the one with the justly famous see-through dress at Cannes.
Would-be first daughter Alexandra Kerry revealed Thursday night that her father's habit of saving men overboard didn't end with his Swift Boat rescue of fellow Vietnam veteran Jim Rassman. In a bizarre recollection, Alexandra told the Democratic Convention crowd how the family waited dockside one summer day to embark on a trip, when the cage housing her sister's hamster "Licorice" tumbled into the drink. "My dad jumped in, grabbed an oar, fished the cage from the water, hunched over the soggy hamster and began to administer CPR," the Kerry daughter told the audience. "There are still to this day some reports of mouth-to-mouth, but I admit it's probably a trick of memory."
| Why "hunch over" the soggy hamster? If you're going to do mouth-to-mouth, why not lift it up? |
Actually, the textbook definition of CPR is mouth-to-mouth resuscitation, though what techniques may be appropriate for hamster rescue is anybody's guess. Too bad Sen. Kerry didn't have his trusty 8mm camera along to reenact his hamster heroism for posterity.
My oft-quoted animal companion, Roswell the Atomic Poodle, does not understand why anyone would revive a hamster instead of devouring it on the spot. Then again, Ros is not a liberal. |