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| -Short Attention Span Theater- |
| It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Kwanzaa |
| 2003-12-09 |
| [shamelessly stolen from relapsedcatholic.com] Twas the night before Kwanzaa And all through the ’hood, Maulana Karenga was up to no good. He’d tortured a woman and spent time in jail. He needed a new scam that just wouldn’t fail. ("So what if I stuck some chick’s toe in a vice? Nobody said revolution was nice!") The Sixties were over. Now what would he do? Why, he went back to school -- so that’s "Dr." to you! He once ordered shootouts at UCLA Now he teaches Black Studies just miles away. Then to top it all off, the good Doctor’s new plan Was to get rid of Christmas and piss off The Man. Karenga invented a fake holiday. He called the thing Kwanzaa. "Hey, what’s that you say? "You don’t get what’s ’black’ about Maoist baloney? You say that my festival’s totally phony? "Who cares if corn isn’t an African crop? Who cares if our harvest’s a month or two off? Who cares if Swalhili’s not our mother tongue? A lie for The Cause never hurt anyone! "Umoja! Ujima! Kujichagulia, too! Collectivist crap never sounded so cool! Those guilty white liberals -- easy to fool. Your kids will now celebrate Kwanzaa in school!" And we heard him exclaim as he drove out of sight: "Happy Kwanzaa to all, except if you’re white!" |
| Posted by:growler |
| #4 |
| Posted by: NotMikeMoore 2003-12-9 9:46:30 PM |
| #3 |
| Posted by: Old Patriot 2003-12-9 1:04:18 PM |
| #2 |
| Posted by: growler 2003-12-9 11:14:49 AM |
| #1 |
| Posted by: Dar 2003-12-9 10:05:38 AM |